A Few Hits off the Ideabong…
TG asks: How far east can you go before you’re heading west?
Ideabong says: It depends on whether you live on a map or a globe. If you live on a globe, are travelling, and the direction is not perfectly north or south, you are simultaneously moving east and west. If you live on a map, you can travel east till you hit the edge. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that the Catholic Church spent a lot of energy, committed acts of violence, and generally lost their credibility while denying that the earth was round, that the earth orbits the sun, and species evolve due to a process known as natural selection. On the bright side, the Pope recently admitted that condoms may be helpful in the fight against AIDS, but I digress… we in fact live on a globe, that orbits the sun, and we understand the origin of species, all thanks to people like Columbus, Galileo and Darwin who had the courage to stand up against religion.
Lost and Hurt asks: About a month ago, I broke up with my girlfriend, and she was truly devastated.
I was convinced that the single life was a one way ticket to freedom and happiness. My first week of being single I thought I was happier, however I noticed that I wasn’t attracted anymore to the girl who I thought I could hook up with as a single guy. It hit me like a ton of bricks how much I missed my girlfriend, and how much she meant to me. I learned after a week that I made such a stupid mistake, I don’t have feelings for the other girl that I thought I did, and I just dropped the love of my life.
That week I tried desperately to get her back, called her crying, sent love letters and flowers. She said she needed time and space. On a Sunday morning I decided to go to her house to give her one of the letters I wrote. When she saw me her eyes got teary and asked why I was there. I asked if she could talk and she asked again why I was there so I left her the letter instead saying how sorry I am and how much I love her. Later that day she texted me thanking me for the letter and carried on with a friendly conversation but mentioned that she wanted time and space.
How do I get my girlfriend back?
Ideabong says: If you want to get your girlfriend back, you have asked the wrong question. You should be asking me if you deserve her back. If you are not concerned by whether you deserve her, you are unlikely to get her. She doesn’t seem stupid, and the fact that she doesn’t want you back means she probably doesn’t trust you as to whether you really want her back. She probably understands that you dumped to explore possibilities with someone else, and decided to want her back after you got rejected. You can lie to yourself about that, but apparently you can’t lie to her. In fact, you do not deserve her back after a stunt like that. Now if you were to be honest with yourself and her, and try to deserve her back, you might get her back. Showing up at her doorstep, and crying and stuff probably isn’t going to do anything for you. She’s going to need to see some improvement based on a harsh self-assessment. Good luck.
Gary asks: Why is the Lone Ranger called ‘Lone’ if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?
Ideabong says: Because Tonto is not a frickin’ Ranger … jeesh!
